Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Fuel

When I moved to Germany I brought a coffee grinder in my carry-on. It was precious to me. It's cliché now to talk about how much you need coffee on the internet, but I don't need coffee as much as I am sustained by it. I don't like it in the way a car doesn't like gasoline, it requires it. This coffee grinder was expensive, it was large, it had a serious sounding name like BistroPro3000 or something, and it was 'randomly' checked at every security checkpoint between Dallas and Düsseldorf.
My first day in my German apartment, I woke up and plugged my coffee grinder in. Sparks. Smoke. The unmistakable smell of a small electrical fire. I unplugged it and looked at it, trying to ascertain the cause of the issue. I looked at my power adapter, it seemed to be working. Like an idiot, I plugged the coffee grinder back in and tried again. Sparks. Smoke. The unmistakable smell of a small electrical fire. And then nothing.
I later found out that it didn't matter which converter or adapter I used, any electrical engine is set to run at a certain speed and voltage, and there is no way to run an American grinder on European electricity. My grinder was trashed and I didn't even get coffee that day.
When you rent a diesel car, the rental car company will usually put THIS IS A DIESEL stickers in at least three places for the driver to see. Filling a diesel engine with gasoline is a quick way to test how 'complete' the complete coverage insurance is. That isn't to say gasoline is bad for all cars. No one would say that,  because it wouldn't make any sense. We know gas is good for some and diesel for others. We know coffee grinders with plugs made for the USA are good there, and grinders with EU plugs are good in the EU. We don't need to try to force one to work on the other's electrical current. We don't get mad at the car for breaking if the driver puts the wrong fuel inside.
Why do we do that for ourselves?
If we see something working for someone else, do we immediately assume it will work for us? Aren't people more varied than cars?
We each have a soul to feed. What feeds our soul is different for each of us. The good news is we all know what feeds our soul, even if we try to deny it.
You know what feeds your soul.
You're feeding your soul when you do something and it immediately puts you at ease, makes you feel fulfilled, and allows you to be present in that moment. You feel like yourself. You feel connection to God, to the world, and to the people you love. For some it might be writing, it might be composing music, it might be going to concerts or painting. It might be sharing a meal or a cup of coffee with people we love. We are all so different and no one can tell you what feeds your soul.
You know that thing you do and when you finish you think "I should really do this more often?" That thing is feeding your soul. Things that feed your soul feel as good when they are over as when you are doing them. 
Take some time to reflect on what feeds your soul. Don't worry about what someone else is doing to feed theirs, only focus on what fuels you. Your engine--your soul--needs to be fueled with specific fuel and today is a good day to find out what you run on. 

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